Jane, Autobiography of Jane Eyre
Wow. After episode 45 I was a little wary of the way this adaption was going, but this episode could not have been more spot on. Bravo, Jane. I applaud you and your bravery. May you have all the happiness in the world.
I am also finding myself unexpectedly interested in this adaptation again. It was a little slow to begin with? And not always successful with characterisation. But I’m enjoying it at the moment…
Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other. Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other. Now there will be no loneliness, for each of you will be companion to the other. Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before you. May beauty surround you both in the journey ahead and through all the years. May happiness be your companion and your days together be good and long upon the earth.
Treat yourselves and each other with respect, and remind yourselves often of what brought you together. Give the highest priority to the tenderness, gentleness and kindness that your connection deserves. When frustration, difficult and fear assail your relationship - as they threaten all relationships at one time or another - remember to focus on what is right between you, not only the part which seems wrong. In this way, you can ride out the storms when clouds hide the face of the sun in your lives - remembering that even if you lose sight of it for a moment, the sun is still there. And if each of you takes responsibility for the quality of your life together, it will be marked by abundance and delight.
Tonerism’s are Toner’s words and sayings - they are parts of his humor that are the most memorable - most of them (in fact almost all) are in some way maths related, but all of you will be able to find some humor in them. Without further ado.. (euck!) - Tonerisms.
"0800 4 TONER"
- After a relatively boring early morning, Toner dances into maths looking notoriously happy, holding a cardboard cutout about 40cm long by 5cm high with “0800 4 TONER” written on it, exclaiming that “If you ever need maths help, all you need to do is ring the number!” - he then explained that he had found it on the side of a box from a printer cartridge/laser toner company. (You really had to be there).
- Tonerism to the max. Whenever Horizontal needed saying, Hozirontal would be Toner’s word. E.g. “A gradient of 0 means the line is hozirontal.”
- Just like above, Vetrical - the Tonerism of Hozirontal. Example: “Rule a vetrical line on your page peoples”
- At algebra time comes the Wubbleyou. It’s W, Toner style.
- Rubbish, in Toner. Used anywhere e.g. “Oh what wubbish - that doesn’t equal that” or in combination with another, more famous Tonerism - “Oh wubbish - I’ll fight ya for it!”
"Box & Whiskey"
- If you know your graphs, you’ll understand this one. A Box & Whisker graph becomes a Box & Whiskey graph under Toner’s command.
- Confused about this one? Exactly. - “Are you all confuddled yet, or shall i ramble on some more?”
- This is just a classic, bad grammar Tonerism.
- A mistook is a mistake - only Toner obviously mistake mistook for mistake!
- Look folks, it’s a Tyrannosaurus Rex! Oh No! What’s this!!! PYTHAGOSAURUS! (it’s Pythagoras for those who don’t know what i’m on about) .. hehe :D
- Probably the most used tonerism, along with the likes of Mistook, a Tringle is a Triangle.. just without the a :)
"Listen" (pronounced Liss-Ten)
- A less obvious tonerism on paper, Lis-ten is Toner’s way of saying listen.. doesn’t make much sense does it? - He pronounces the T - it makes you lisTen tho :)
"Sodistics" (or sadistics)
- For those of you that know Statistics, you’ll understand why. Sodistics. Statistics are Sodistic. They are also Sad, hence, sadistics and sodistics. One of the greats :D
- We’ve all heard of a square, octagon, hexagon etc. The name wollygon is given to any one of these :)
- A variant of wollygon - a Whatagon generally refers to the word “Polygon” although Whatagon and Wollygon do cross over in their usage, from time to time :)
- Lala, looloo, doo daa… A swircle - it’s like a circle - in fact, it IS a circle, just Toner’s been hacking at its name :D
- A Classic tonerism - Dismals are decimals, but because decimals are dismal, they are dismals. Or at least, thats what i interpreted it as :P
- Never forget to cut things out with your Skizzas :)
"Official Kermit Green"
- This Tonerism quote was used in conjunction with “…(do it this way).. or Official Kermit Green will come after you” - oh so brilliant :D
"Divide the doo-daa"
- I still can’t decide whether this was Toner thinking to himself while doing something on the board, or explaining to our class - either way, it’s a great tonerism.
"Auto Complete System"
- Im not entirely sure, but i think this was used when we were given a formula. Toner said something along the lines of “plug it into the Auto Complete System (a.k.a formula) and ..” - but i’m not entirely sure
"Say to yourself: ‘Self, Can I simplify?’"
- Oooh boy, we’re getting into the extreme realms of funny Tonerisms here - this has got to be one of his best. While explaining something to us, he came to a vertex and stood there after explaining how to start the problem, and then said “It’s now time where you must say to yourself: “Self, Can I simplify?” ” - i remember at this point the class erupted :D
"Meanwhile back in the maths world"
- General Purpose Tonerism - Toner used this whenever he wanted to get our attention back on him :)
"Sine is my friend"
- I’m not entirely sure where this one came from, but he said it while we were doing Trigonometery, so everyone remember - Sine is your friend.
"Algebra: The Return"
"Son of Algebra: Just when you thought it was safe…"
- This is a real extract from what Toner wrote on the board when we started the 2nd part of algebra - in that exact order. This was another one of those absolutely hilarious tonerisms that caused an eruption of laughter :D
"Break a duck and get on with it!"
- Used like “build a bridge and get over it” - “Oh come on! Just break a duck and get on with it!”
"No worries Bruce, we’ll just whip these out…"
- Hehe, this one came up when we were rearranging equations - i think this was more a case of Toner talking to himself than the class, but we all heard it, and it was funny nonetheless :)
"Two To’s - To squared - TOOT"
- My gawd, i don’t remember where this one came from but damn it was funny! It must’ve been number.. or maybe algebra, but my god. :P
- Another quirky little Tonerism - this one came while doing Geometry - the drawing part, and Toner had to use a compass on the board… that was a feat and a half considering how brilliantly bad his writing is :D
"Car, a car and a carcar"
- Once again, i don’t remember where this one came from. Imagine a middle-aged maths teacher saying THAT in the middle of a class though. Toner did. :D
"I’ll fight ya for it!"
- This quote is the peak of Tonerisms - definately the most used Tonerism of all time, if anyone disputes something Toner says, he always uses this, i.e. “but the answer is… this”, “No it’s not.. its this.. I’ll fight ya for it!”
"You havn’t seen my friends…"
- This one is another classic Tonerism - he usually combined it with “I’ll fight ya for it” after somebody pulled the old “yeah whatever!” - i.e. “I’ll fight ya for it!” “yeah right!” “.. You havn’t seen my friends…”
Toner toward the end of the year said that he didn’t actually have any big scary friends.. but thats beside the point :D
THERE WE HAVE IT!! TONERISMS!!
if i ever have kids instead of being like “it’s a boy” im going to send out highly bewildering cards that say things like “it’s the chosen one” and “it’s probably not a lizard” and “we’re not sure what it is, but it just set the couch on fire, please send help” with a different thing to every person i send one to just to see what people show up at the baby shower with